How did I get here?

To me, one of the scariest things is not knowing how you got somewhere -- like when you're driving and suddenly you "wake up" and you're not quite sure how you got where you did. You don't remember turns, traffic lights... nothing.

So I was listening to Francis Chan (an amazing teacher and preacher from Simi Valley, CA). He talked about some missionaries in Turkey that were brutally, disturbingly tortured for three hours by Islamic extremists, and then killed right before the police showed up. In an interview with one of the missionaries' wife, the woman was asked what she thought should be done to the men. Now keep in mind that her husband had things done to him that were beyond belief, things that would make most people sick to their stomach. Her reply?

"Forgive them for they know not what they do."

Chan goes on to talk about the Passion of the Christ movie. He asked if we felt like we would have wanted to jump in front of the whips and barbs to take the lashes Christ was taking for us; would we leap in to take the lashes that we really deserved?

Which led to the question in all our minds, "What is it that we really deserve?"

And here's the kicker. He goes on to say that if we as Christians were to be truly like Christ, we are to embrace suffering for his kingdom, not run from it.

So how did I get here, in all my self righteous glory? How did I get to the point where I think that I deserve better because I do things that are morally correct? If Christ didn't get better treatment, why I do throw a pity party when things don't go well for me?

How did I get here? I don't even remember the turns I took. I just woke up and found myself here.